Emotions are one of the most important parts of our lives, which we encounter over and over again throughout the day, and in every experience, big or small, simple or complex, we experience a range of different feelings. Exploring emotions is useful for anyone who hopes to know themselves, grow, establish healthy relationships, and pursue what they want in life. Emotions are the compass of life, and if we do not experience them and do not know them, our life functions will be disrupted.
The Impact of Emotions in Daily Life
Our emotions show us who we are and how we have been affected by our life history. Many of our reactions are initiated by emotions, which raises questions about what emotions lie beneath these behaviors, which of our emotions are adaptive and which are maladaptive, which of our emotions are triggered in the present, but are rooted in our past?
The biggest mistake we make when dealing with strong negative emotions is trying to ignore them and push them away. Think of a child who is scared of something or needs help. “Usually the child will go to the caregiver, cry, tell them not to cry or think about the pain.” What happens when you deny their negative emotions, shame them for having these emotions and behaviors, or turn your back on them and ignore them? Things are likely to get much worse. In fact, if we resist or ignore the emotions, they don’t go away. When we try to push the negative emotions away, they come back with more intensity. What we don’t want to see “just gets bigger.” But it’s possible to look at the situation and respond differently. This time, pause, kneel down so that you’re facing them, look them in the eye, and say, “It sounds like you need something; I am here to help you. It is certainly not easy, but it is a response that changes relationships.
Sometimes a child just wants to be heard when experiencing negative emotions. Listen to them. When your child experiences intense negative emotions, they are sending you a message with negative behaviors that they need your support. Your behavior should also convey this message to them: I am here with love and care for you and will help you. Negative emotions may seem scary on the surface, but they are not. They are necessary for every human being and are part of our true selves. What is dangerous and scary is the suppression and ignoring of these emotions.
Negative psychological consequences of avoiding or denying emotions
A large part of human problems is caused by an unusual phenomenon in the mind: not being in touch with emotions, denying emotions and not touching emotional experiences. Sometimes avoiding emotions, especially difficult emotions, can be derived from a pattern that has become a habit. Sometimes you don’t even realize you’re avoiding it, but not listening to and paying attention to your uncomfortable emotions can have negative consequences. Christopher Grammer, author of The Conscious Path to Self, points to patterns that people tend to form when experiencing difficult emotions: “I don’t like this emotion,” “I wish I didn’t have this emotion,” “I shouldn’t have this emotion,” “I’m wrong to have this emotion.” These patterns don’t help. The more you fight these emotions, the stronger they seem to become. The thought that “I’m bad” only confuses you and causes you to do things that may have negative consequences.
Positive Results of Being Aware of Your Emotions
Awareness of yourself and your emotions can help you change this pattern. When you don’t like an emotion, consider what the emotion is telling you. Is a need being awakened? Self-awareness and emotions are skills that can help you understand your emotions. You become aware of your inner experience when you observe it with curiosity and interest. What is happening? What are my physical emotions telling me? What is this emotion? When did this emotion come to me? In essence, you are paying attention to what your emotions are telling you and at the same time paying attention to yourself. Being aware of your emotions helps you make the right choice of skills and avoid using destructive methods.
Conclusion
Finally, it should be remembered that emotions are a part of our lives. Whether we tend to hide them, avoid them, or express them, they guide our lives in different ways.
